Personal Responsibility by Michelle Dellino
We all make choices. In fact, making decisions both big and small is what we do all day, everyday. I'm a big believer in personal responsibility. This belief has shaped my career path, the way I have handled my illness, my academic decisions and performance, and probably most importantly my personal relationships, and with whom I choose to have them. As many people reading know, I'm not the person to talk to if you want to explain away your behavior or poor choices because of things that have happened to you in the past, how your grew up, how much money you do or don't have, etc. Does this mean that I have no compassion or empathy? I don't think that it does, but it does mean that I hold everyone - the individual, myself, even society - to a high standard. People can make mistakes, change their minds about the kind of lives they want to lead, or just do stupid things. I believe that forgiveness and understanding is important, but only when it comes with an understanding of personal accountability. Nor is all of this meant to say that everyone must be goal oriented, upwardly mobile, etc. If someone has decided that they are find with mediocrity or what have you, that's their own choice - and that's the whole point. If you choose a certain life, don't complain. Before you do, look at what you are complaining about and ask yourself if you have done anything - and I mean really taken steps to change things. I complain and I don't always take responsibility for those complaints, but I sure try to. I don't like my weight, so I bust my ass at the gym and watch what I eat. I don't want to have to worry about money and I don't like not being able to always get what I want, so I am choosing to become an attorney with lots of job security and earning potential. I don't like to see people getting slapped on the wrist, given free passes because of what's in the past, etc., so I'm doing something about that. You get the idea. I'm not perfect, and either are you, and that's okay, but working toward determining where it is in life that you will be happy seems to be an important thing to do.
This isn't any kind of a thinly veiled statement about anyone of anything in particular. Sometimes people ask me, "where you talking about me?" The answer is almost always no. If I was writing about you, and if I care about you at all, I would have likely already told you what I think.
I was actually just thinking about a certain class that I have and how sometimes I chose to be involved, to contribute, to challenge myself, and to fully appreciate the relevance and importance of what is being discussed. But once in awhile, on other days, I prefer to shut my mind off, exist on the periphery, ignore the relevance, and just think about something else. Sure, I'm listening, and I'm probably even taking notes, but I'm not fully engaged. I'm disappointed in myself when I do this, but I'm aware that I'm doing it, and I don't complain if I miss out at all. I'm not perfect. I want to make myself into a better, more well-rounded, and well-informed person, but sometimes I am overloaded. Over the past few years I have come to realize that if I want to really process something, to really care about something, and to fully engage myself, that means going above and beyond just listening and saying something once in awhile. IT also doesn't mean being one of those people everyone else hates. You know the kind - the one who has to have something "profound" to say about everything, who wants to appear so thoughtful and engaged. It isn't about appearances, or quantity over quality. The heavy lifting takes place in the mind.
So when I thought about all of this and wondered if I would decide that my mind is up to the task of being fully engaged, I started thinking about the importance of personal accountability and responsibility and what a lost message this seems to be in this modern day society . . . Everyone's a victim of something or someone - society, the economy, their family, etc., and yet no one's the aggressor or at fault.
Interesting times that we live in.
This isn't any kind of a thinly veiled statement about anyone of anything in particular. Sometimes people ask me, "where you talking about me?" The answer is almost always no. If I was writing about you, and if I care about you at all, I would have likely already told you what I think.
I was actually just thinking about a certain class that I have and how sometimes I chose to be involved, to contribute, to challenge myself, and to fully appreciate the relevance and importance of what is being discussed. But once in awhile, on other days, I prefer to shut my mind off, exist on the periphery, ignore the relevance, and just think about something else. Sure, I'm listening, and I'm probably even taking notes, but I'm not fully engaged. I'm disappointed in myself when I do this, but I'm aware that I'm doing it, and I don't complain if I miss out at all. I'm not perfect. I want to make myself into a better, more well-rounded, and well-informed person, but sometimes I am overloaded. Over the past few years I have come to realize that if I want to really process something, to really care about something, and to fully engage myself, that means going above and beyond just listening and saying something once in awhile. IT also doesn't mean being one of those people everyone else hates. You know the kind - the one who has to have something "profound" to say about everything, who wants to appear so thoughtful and engaged. It isn't about appearances, or quantity over quality. The heavy lifting takes place in the mind.
So when I thought about all of this and wondered if I would decide that my mind is up to the task of being fully engaged, I started thinking about the importance of personal accountability and responsibility and what a lost message this seems to be in this modern day society . . . Everyone's a victim of something or someone - society, the economy, their family, etc., and yet no one's the aggressor or at fault.
Interesting times that we live in.
posted by Mike at 6:53 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home